It was as easy as 1-2-3… Month #1 – readjusting after the honeymoon;
Month #2 – celebrating my brother’s wedding and now, we’ve made it to Month #3 as
husband and wife and it just keeps getting better and better! It’s a whole new chapter, being married, you know? What
blows my mind is that after talking to other newlyweds, there seems to be a
theme from them: married life isn’t that
much different than pre-wedding life.
I completely disagree!
Granted, we moved into our first home 2 months before the
wedding, so our living situation didn’t change much, and we still love each
other uncontrollably… but there is something so different about being a married
couple. It’s wonderful and terrifying. It’s wondering if you’re living up to
the (sometimes imaginary) expectations that your other half had about marriage.
It’s planning your next steps together, but still soaking up the here and now.
Our relationship started out a little differently than most.
Well, we followed the “norm” to some degree, but with a different twist. It was
normal in the sense that the first time I saw him, I turned into a babbling
schoolgirl and made a fool of myself in front of him. (You know the kind of embarrassment that makes you want to just sink
into the floor and pretend it never happened? Yeah, that kind of embarrassment!)
But it turned out alright because while I was mentally sinking into the floor,
I saw that he was smiling and showed exactly how kind and forgiving he can be.
Pretty normal start to a relationship, right?
Well, here’s the twist: When I first met my husband, he was
on a rotational program through work and he only had 3 months left in town when
we started dating. That made for a challenge! I mean, how do you start dating
someone and know that within 90 days, they would be moving 500 miles away? I’m
all about risks, but this one was a doozy! The good news is that we each had a
good feeling about our relationship, so we talked (and talked, and talked…) and
figured out a plan that I’d like to share with you.
We call it “Daily Doses of Fun”, (or DDOF. for short).
For 90 days, we tried to do ONE Daily Dose of Fun together.
Since we were still getting to know one another, this had multiple benefits: 1)
We spent lots of time together to get to know each other; 2) We got to explore
a new town together (we both moved to the same small town at the same time);
and 3) our DDOF activities gave us the foundation for our soon-to-be long
distance relationship. We had something to talk about on the phone after he
moved. Things like “Remember when we went hiking to the White Rocks?” or “I saw
Jimmy at the pizza shop today, he asked about you.” That really helped.
Here are some examples of our DDOF activities while dating: © cooking our first lobster © pumpkin carving contest © teaching my puppy new tricks
© trying a new restaurant © bike rides © weekend getaway to
Montreal ©
skydiving ©
flying a kite ©
trying out a new recipe ©
start up an aquarium ©
train for a marathon together ©
pottery class ©
comedy club © NYE
in NYC ©
camping ©
brewery tour © swimming
in the local reservoir ©
cliff-diving ©
wiffleball league ©
dueling pianos ©
trivia night ©
Saratoga race track ©
rooftop bars ©
kayaking©
charity bike rides© etc.
 |
| Top row (left to right): Skiing, pottery class, surf and turf recipe, pumpkin carving, Steelers football game, driving range, Chicago Marathon 2009. Bottom row (left to right): Cubs baseball game, hot dog tour of Chicago, kayaking with the dog, 1/2 marathon, cooking our first lobster, skydiving. |
Fast forward 5 years and here we are today: husband and
wife, living happily ever after!
My theory on how to maintain the “happily ever after” is
based on how our relationship started: DDOF-style! We are used to
spending time together, trying new things, and exploring our surroundings. Why should
that stop just because we ‘got hitched’?
So here's my plan. I want to document a list of our “married life DDOF”
activities. Keep checking back for more fun ideas. Feel free to give them a try if they’ll work for you!- Date Night Scavenger Hunt
- Business Trip Love Letters
- Competitive edge tournament
